Please pray for me

Hello, I am a mom of a 18 month old toddler and am suffering from post partum depression. My husband is about to deploy and I'll be all alone with her. Each time as she gets older it gets so much harder and so much worse. I feel like a failure and a terrible m other. There are times when I don't want to be bothered by my own daughter. She cries all day every day she throws tantrums she doesn't listen and I can't do anything about it but lock myself in a room and cry out of frustration. I don't know if I can do this on my own. I am begging to have negative thoughts and I just need to find some inner peace... I need help... Please tell me I'm not crazy