Should I be trying to have more sex?

Question

My life is in a circle of frustration. For the past two years, I've been having little dry spells with my husband. The thing is, every time we have sex I am left feeling sore for about a week, and then from that point on I don't want to have sex because I remember how much it sucked afterwards. I thought I read somewhere that women who wait too long to have sex make it harder for their vaginas to idk enjoy sex or something. Can anyone back this up?

Answer

I have 3 things to tell you. 
1. As was recommended,  see a doctor and make sure there is nothing physically causing the pain.  (You can also look into vaginismus as a potential cause). 
2. Using a good lubricant can also make a big difference,  silicone lubricants (condom safe) or coconut oil (not condom safe) (both harder to clean up than a water based lubricant,  but help things slide much better). There is nothing wrong with having to use a lubricant. 
3. From experience,  when my wife and I were first married (both virgins), after the birth of both of our kids (both c sections, 6 weeks after), after our miscarriage,  and for a time during one of the pregnancies when my wife was on pelvic rest, so no sex, due to a complication; in all those instances when we began having sex again it was painful for my wife for a time as my wife's body adjusted back to that activity. 
I would recommended having frequent sex for a time 1-3 times a week our using a dialtor such as https://www.amazon.com/CalExoticsDr-Berman-Intimate-Basics-Dilator/dp/B00121B0H8 (one of the cheapest ones).  Think of it as exercise,  if you don't regularly exercise and suddenly start,  more then likely you'll experience pain as your body adjusts to the new activity.  The same applies to your pelvic area,  your stretching  and using the tendons,  ligaments, and muscles in a way that your body isn't used to and it takes time for your body to get used to that. 
It also doesn't hurt to have a glass of wine before hand to help you relax. 
Hope some of this helps.

Answer

Vaginas can get some atrophy to where they don't stretch as easily if they aren't getting used. Lube and going slower might help. If not, talk to your doctor to make sure nothing else is going wrong.

Answer

Coconut oil is nice

Answer

Does he not know what he’s doing?

Should I be trying to have more sex?

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