S/o and I fighting much more lately. It’s been about nine months since the first big fight where I had found him talking to multiple girls sexually over Snapchat, even if they were cam girls I explained it definitely crossed a line and had to stop. He explained at the time he was using it as an alternative to porn, deleted everything. We were just getting better when it turned out last month I found him still lying. It turned out what he told me about Snapchat was only a half truth, instead of “just trying to get photos/porn in a different way” it was a fetish he had that he wanted to be watched, so he was sending pics/video back. The only reason I found that out was he had been downloading and then deleting a dating app multiple times. He said he had been using that specific app because it had a “live video option” and it’d been months since I found the Snapchat and it had been long since deleted. He only admitted to the fetish when I was starting to get my things to leave and honestly the fetish doesn’t bother me, what did bother me was lying about it the whole four year relationship and especially during the eight months in between me finding the Snapchat and dating app. He knows I’ll leave him now if he’s lying or not telling me about anything else.

So the biggest problem now is I keep thinking he’s lying. I keep thinking there’s something else that’s just “not a big deal” or we haven’t discussed yet so it’s not wrong.

I’m 25 weeks pregnant so I really need to find a way over this or decide to leave. I’m so afraid we’re going to break up if we don’t figure this out and have the baby while I’m still being so paranoid all the time.