Baby shower controversy

Ma

So my mother in law made a comment that rubbed me the wrong way. I saw my friends grandparents the other day while with my MIL and asked if they went to the baby shower he and his fiancé had recently. His grandpa responded with “heck no, but she did. That’s a girl thing.” My MIL responded with “that’s what I keep trying to tell her!” First of all, I could care less to have a baby shower. I don’t like the idea of people feeling obligated to by us gifts because we chose to have a child. My mom insisted on planning a shower, and I didn’t exactly have a choice. Secondly, I didn’t even like the fact my husband and our friends husbands weren’t invited to our wedding shower because it only showered me. Both of us were getting married. My mom and sister planned that. Third, he took part in making this baby too. I just have to carry it because that’s how it works. Why can’t it be normal for men to attend these types of events? They should be equally involved because it impacts their lives as well. And lastly, I absolutely DO NOT like attending an event that is solely for the purpose of celebrating me. I rarely even had birthday parties growing up. It skyrockets my anxiety to have all that attention on me, and I would feel so out of place without my husband with me. I just don’t get why people don’t understand that we do everything together. It took us nearly 3 years, 2 losses, and 8 clomid cycles to get this baby. Along with him developing prostatitis during this time making TTC even more difficult. I feel like we both reserve every right to be at this shower, and I’m tired of the comments. I had a conversation with someone tonight and it was the first time someone didn’t ask about my pregnancy at all since announcing and I’m 30 weeks. It was a relief. I’m tired of gettin asked the same things everyday. I love our baby with all my heart, but if I could hide away in my house until he gets here I’d be perfectly content. Thanks for letting me vent. I’m just over all the ridiculousness.