I was abused by my ex for a long time. It’s kinda weird when I look back, it feels so surreal. Like no way did that happen to me? Sometimes, I can’t believe it. Like he really did hit me and rape me and abuse me in every way he could. He brainwashed me into thinking so many messed up and untrue things…I became someone so alien to myself. I mean, I can barely recognise me when I look back at photos of me from back then. It’s so weird. Like it was a different person, not me…he’s never really left my life either. Always kept tabs. He’d recently contacted me and he claimed that none of it happened. But I know it did. But it feels like no one believes me. But it did happen and I’m not crazy. But I feel crazy bc part of me is doubting that it ever did happen…idk why I find it so hard to believe that it happened to me…you hear about it all the time. You never expect it to happen to you tho.

He’s really got into my head and under my skin. I’m doubting myself so much again. But it did happen. I know it happened. He’s convinced so many that it didn’t and ppl think I’m crazy but I’m not and it did happen. I swear it did.

Ugh, I’m actually losing my mind. I feel like I’m losing my grip on reality a little more everyday…but I swear it did happen :(

I think I’m just ranting lol sorry guys. I think I’m losing it lol