I have a son that is three years old now. At a year old we began trying for a second child. Three month in we got pregnant, went to get it confirmed and for the first time ever I heard words like may not be a viable pregnancy. I didn’t know what that meant nothing was explained. I switched doctors, than met with the over polite doctor that said my numbers were rising but not doubling. After about a week of light spotting it was said to be a pregnancy of unknown origin but It was a suspected ectopic. They told me to do methotrexate to terminate. Which really fucked up my body... they tell u three months than six months... to regulate. I felt so nieve about it all, I was so numb to find out I was pregnant on Mother’s Day to lose it by our one year wedding anniversary.

Than I got pregnant again at the time that baby was gonna be due I took it as a sign. I was pregnant for 4 whole days was a chemical. Than two months later April I was pregnant again! My numbers were doubling everything looked good. Than I began hurting so bad i went to the er they told me it was a ectopic but nurse said she was gonna call my doctor. She came back saying he said it was a threatened miscarriage. I was sent home... than I was still hurting to the point I couldn’t walk the next day but I had to go do blood work. While there I asked to speak to the doctor to clarify if this was normal. After getting into a enormous fight with the desk secretary she told me they would have to get hospital records and I would need to schedule a appointment. Again I went home...that night I went to the bathroom and I was dizzy and began sweating all over. I called my husband in to call me a ambulance. Got to the hospital they again did a ultrasound and told me it was for a fact a ectopic that ruptured my left tube and I needed to go right away for surgery.

After overcoming that I had another chemical this past December. Lasted a whole day... Just another shred of hope to be disappointed. Now comes to today almost 5 weeks pregnant. 😁

I am sooo ready for this baby! I am not doing hcg quats this time I am going to wait til 8 weeks appointment. I thought if I go early before that my numbers would show something and prevent a loss. But it didn’t and all it does is stress me out. So ladies maybe u been in my shoes maybe your going through it now. It’s a long journey and hopefully we all get our rainbows 🌈 after the rain. When I first joined a support group this image was shared. I found comfort in it, and now I have my rainbow and u will too.

Thanks for reading 😘