Day 49 ended with tears as I felt the same got reaching feeling of my bottom get That feeling

Aunt flow in back in town

Sadly meaning that once again I am not pregnant

At this point I am jelly of everyone in my family for my sister and brother did not even want kids mistreat the kids they have but had them with out even trying yet I the one who raised 7 kids that were not even mine now that I myself want a child my body is flawed broken and unwilling

The feeling that for once if my life I can look at my body and hate myself for the inside just kills me

At this point I kinda just wanna curl up in a ballon give up