I’ve had thoughts of suicide for years. It was always a common thing for me. I’ve never thought about actually going through with it but it’s just something about this year. It feels like the urges are stronger. Especially on my period, my emotions have just gotten stronger (I’ve never been super emotional on my period) and I’d just cry and just want to end it all. I’ve told my doctor about it but he kind of just brushed it off and told me to take birth control. I just wanted to take a whole bottle of pills and end it. It feels like I don’t have anything to live for. I feel like I’m not going to live past my 20s. I think I’m just scared of the future. I don’t feel comfortable talking to my parents because I don’t know how they’d take it. Especially since sometimes black parents don’t think really care about mental health. I even had a mental break down last year because my mother had did something really backstabbing (not gonna go into) and that was the closest I’ve ever been to actually killing myself. She kind of just swept it under the rug and made me food. It’s like it never happened and we don’t talk about it. I don’t feel comfortable telling my friends because I don’t like people to know what’s going on with me. It’s not that I don’t trust them, I’ve just been raised as a private person and to deal with things yourself. I’ve tried talking to the school counselor but it just feels like I’m talking to a brick wall. I just feel very overwhelmed at this point and don’t know what to do. Does anyone feel this way or felt this way and got help? How?