Miscarriage has been a dark time of my life. Having to fight with my emotions and body, not know how I feel and what my body is trying to tell me. However, today is my birthday, my partner paid for a trip away. Planned to walk, but the rain has stopped us, so got some much needed rest. Today my body gave me the best present, I stopped bleeding after 3 weeks. Both my partner and myself feel it's time to start again, despite still struggling with our loss. Still fighting with my emotions, feeling guilty for moving forward but also I feel my son would benefit from a sibling and, of course, we would love another. Even writing this I go back and forth with my emotions. However, this trip is both a chance to remember our loss and grieve but also mark moving forward.