Last week my cousin just found out that my nephew had a stage 3/4 brain tumor that was cancerous. My nephew and son are the same age, both 9 this year. My nephew was born first then my son in December of 2010. Once i found out i told my cousin that i would head out to Arizona (that’s where they live) so she can rest or take a shower or something while me and my mom went. And so my son can play some board games or something with my nephew. I told my boyfriend what was going on and because he has his kids the weekend we are going to Arizona he said “so you’re just gonna abandon me the weekend i have my kids”....... excuse the fuck out of me... my family needs me right now and that where I’m going to be. Wednesday was my nephews first radiation treatment, he went into a-coma. He had a seizure and hemorrhaged. They put him on a ventilator and on Thursday he passed away. It’s been tough for my whole family. And pregnancy hormones or not I’ve been crying way more because i look at my son and think he was your age. Thursday i called my boyfriend and told him next weekend is the funeral I’m going to Arizona Friday (2/15/19)to make sure my cousins are okay and to help her with whatever she needs. He was talking to his youngest son so i didn’t say anything else. And then i heard hello are you gonna tell me what fucking happened.... being hormonal or not don’t talk to me like I’m a kid cause I’m not. Second I just lost my nephew. Have some compassion. I told him when you have a second to talk and with less of an attitude then we can talk. And he said whatever i don’t know what the fuck you’re problem is. You’re abandoning us anyways like you always do and hung up on me. I haven’t talked to him since then. I’m not hurt nor am i bothered. I think i just don’t care anymore. I got bitched at because i travel back and forth from LA to San Francisco for work once a month. And this just pushed it to where i don’t really give a fuck what he says anymore.

I just wanna know am i in the wrong? I texted him to see if he would be more pleasant yesterday and didn’t text me back so i dropped it. I’m pregnant, i just lost my nephew and taking care of my son. I don’t want or need the extra drama. It’s not comfortable to deal with that.

Side note. Hug your babies. I’ve been hugging mine nonstop since this happened. It’s devastating.

UPDATE:

Today was our first ultrasound and because we haven’t talked much he didn’t show up for our ultrasound. He missed the baby move and wave. I’m beyond hurt. And tomorrow I’m leaving for my nephews funeral. I’m beyond hurt. Beyond hurt and don’t know what to do.