*long post warning 😬*

I’m a junior in college & my two roommates and I are best friends with a guy that lived across the hall from us our freshman year (he’s the same year as all of us). After a month or two of knowing him I started to have major feelings for this guy. At the end of the school year we both got super drunk, I ended up in his room alone with him, and we told each other how much we loved the other and kissed a little bit. About a week after that he told me that he just couldn’t risk our friendship so we shouldn’t do anything.

Last year (year 2) he took a year to go to community college but we still stayed really good friends & FaceTimed a few times a week. We rarely brought up what happened the year before but when we did I would always laugh and tell him that I could wait for him to realize we’re meant to be.

This year he’s back at our college & the four of us (him, my roommates, and me) all hang out at least once a week since he lives in the dorms & we have an apartment. During a party we had around a month ago, we both got super drunk & we ended up in my room making out & I gave him a bj 😬 he kept saying that this was going to happen eventually and we can’t let it ruin our friendship - nothing else happened that night. The next day I told him that what had happened wasnt super serious but that it did mean a little something to me, and he said that he was just drunk, it didn’t mean anything to him, & that it *couldn’t* mean anything to him.

He does talk about other girls with me but sometimes he’s flirting with me & being a bit sexual? But he still says we won’t end up together? Basically things with this guy are pretty complicated & I’m not sure if I should keep trying or just give up.

Any advice or personal experiences to help me figure this out would be great!! 🥰🥰