It’s a stupid question.. I know. But please no hate...please.

Long story ahead.

So my babies dad(on and off boyfriend of 5 years) and I haven’t had sex in months. For many MANY reasons. I’m the only one saying no.

At the beginning when things were good and sex was still happening we would occasionally wake each other up to have sex. As time went on I started to notice him purposely trying his hardest to not wake me up.. as he proceeded to touch me in my sleep. Especially as our sex life started becoming non existent.

So the other night I decided to pretend I was asleep, to see just how far he ACTUALLY goes with me while I’m unconscious (I’m a very hard sleeper) he touched me everywhere no matter how many time I “woke up” and told him NO stop touching me... as soon as I’d fall back “asleep” he’d continue, even as far as penetrating his fingers inside me. (Never his penis).

I suspected he was recording what he was doing to me in my sleep so I “woke up” and asked for his phone which he never has a problem with me seeing and he LITERALLY ran across the house when I got up to grab it and locked himself in the bathroom-turned it all on me of course and all of this obviously lead to an argument, waking our son up and lead to another breakup.. I never saw his phone and he swears he wasn’t recording me.🙄

Now on to TONIGHT.

Pretended to be asleep again because I wanted to see if he actually wouldn’t touch me in my sleep again as he promised.... he did of course, penetrating me, touching me all over, licking my juices off of his fingers and using them to wank, even as far as sticking his tongue in ALL areas below (as he held up a flash light.. or his camera?) and as soon as I flinched at any point during this he stopped suddenly and pretended He wasn’t doing anything..

Is this rape or just plain PIG like behavior... because I feel very VERY violated and scared.