Are you considering sleep training using controlled crying? I didn't want to do it, but after a night where I gave up and coslept on the couch, I started yesterday. Read below to hear how it's working for me!

My girl is the Jekyll and Hyde of sleep. She's been sleeping in her crib from day 1, and after a couple weeks of typical newborn sleep (waking up every 2-3 hours to eat), she would sleep 9pm-9am, waking up only once or twice.

At around 3 months, she was refusing to sleep at night. It would often take over an hour to get her to sleep, bouncing and rocking. She's a big baby, so my back was constantly aching and I developed Mommy Thumb (a type of tendonitis in the wrist). So painful.

By month 4, it hit a peak when she started her 4 month regression. Not only was she waking up every couple hours, but few times she would also wake up at night totally awake and would take hours to get her back down again. went to my good friend Google and realized that she was probably overtired! Her naps were sporadic and usually 2 30min ones per day, which is not nearly enough for a 4 month old. So, I started a nap schedule.

In order to get her to sleep, I had to bounce her for naps. Because of my Mommy Thumb, I needed to relax my wrist, so I bounced her in a wareable carrier.

Within a week, she was going down to sleep at 7pm, waking at 12 and 4 for food, then up at 7am. Some nights she only woke at 3/4, and twice she slept totally through! I thought I was a genius!

She was so dependant on bouncing though. My back was killing me. Since I had to use the carrier, she only napped on me, so it was hard to get anything done.

Leap 5 hit. Sleep was once again awful. Every night, I'd put her down around 7pm, and she would wake up two or three (sometimes more) times before settling down at 9pm or 10pm. She had learned how to roll onto her front, so that kept waking her up.

Things got a little better since she realized she likes sleeping that way, and then worse again. She started waking back up immediately after putting her in her crib! Three days ago, she woke up 6 or 7 times. I gave up. I brought her downstairs onto the sofa (I asked my husband to leave the bed, but he was half asleep because this happened until 1am, and he didn't understand I wanted to bring the baby in bed - he thought I was asking so he wouldn't have to listen to her crying). I coslept with her on the sofa. Luckily we have a very deep sofa with removable pillows. She slept great...but me? Not so much.

I decided it was time to try the Ferber method. I needed her to sleep better at night and to nap in her crib. We had tried controlled crying about a month ago (at 5 months old), but I think she was too young and it was heartbreaking. She turned red from crying so hard. My husband felt terrible too. My husband hates hearing her cry (but of course he's not the one that wakes up multiple times a night... I do all the night waking).

Despite most recommendations to start sleep training at night time, I knew it would be hard for my husband, so I did it during the day. Nap times were already established. Yesterday, I put her down for her morning nap in her crib. I gave her a lovie blanket toy, turned on some music, gave her a kiss and said "have a good nap, Mommy loves you." I left, and shut the door behind me. She cried instantly.

10 minutes, I went in and I repositioned her (she travels around a lot in her crib). Gave her her toy back, kissed her, and walked out again. More crying. 15 minutes in, I went back in and did the same. I watched the clock, waiting for the 20 minute mark, knowing I'd likely have to go back again because she was still crying.

The crying slowed, and then stopped. I looked at the clock, and it had been 15 more minutes. I looked at the baby monitor... Sleep. She was asleep. Hallelujah!

She slept for 45 minutes. I waited to see if she'd get back to sleep, but after 10 minutes it was evident that it wasn't happening.

Second nap time, I did the same. It only took her 20 minutes (consoled once at 15 minutes). Third nap, it took 15 minutes. No consoling.

Bedtime. 7:30pm. She ate until she was drowsy. I put her in bed. Slept in two minutes. She woke up once at 11pm for food and a change, and slept until 8am! Only one waking!

This morning nap, I put her down at 9:45. She cried until 9:51. 6 minutes. She's stirred a little, but she is still sleeping at 10:50 now. YAY! An hour nap in her crib! She hasn't done this since she was 2 months old (now 6 months).

I already feel much happier. I was starting to become depressed. I felt too attached, like I wasn't even a human being, but just a baby-feeder and bouncer. I was going through the motions. Every day was blending into one. Since she only slept on me during the day and wouldn't sleep consistently at night until after 9 (waking up multiple times between 7-9), my only free time was between 10-12, and by then I was so tired that I couldn't do much anyway. I wanted to draw, read, write, play, bake, cook... I wanted to clean the house! I needed time to myself to feel normal again.

The last two days, sleep training her... I feel NORMAL again. I love my baby girl to the moon and back, and I want to give her all the love and attention I can. A happy mom means a happy baby.

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I know sleep training is controversial. I think some people have the wrong idea of "cry it out" and think that you just shut your baby in their room hungry and with a dirty diaper and leave them to cry until they pass out from lack of oxygen or something! That's not the case. Make sure they're fed and have a dry diaper. Give them a kiss. Watch them on the monitor to make sure they're safe. Go in to console them if they need it. I started at 10 minutes, but some people start at check ins at 2 or 3 minutes. Do whatever makes you feel comfortable. If they're so distressed that they're vomitting or their voice starts to become hoarse, by all means go to them and pick them up, and try again next sleep time.

I am amazed by what has been achieved in just a day. She's still asleep now at 11:15, so not only is she napping in her crib, but she's napping longer than 30-45 minute capnap bursts. I'd say, it's been a success.

I didn't want to do this, but I'm so glad I did. If you're feeling how I was feeling, this might be worth it for you to try. I think it helped that I already had a nap time established. Otherwise, it might've been more difficult. If you are happy with however your baby currently sleeps, whether that's cuddling you, cosleeping, 4-5 nightly feedings... That's fine too. Whatever works for you. 😊

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TLDR (Because I know that was long AF);

Baby was having trouble getting to sleep and staying asleep, as well as refusing to nap in crib. Started sleep training (controlled crying) yesterday at nap times, and after 40 minutes of crying the first time, she is now already sleeping about 5 minutes after setting her down and only woke once at night for food and is now taking longer naps. I was feeling pretty crappy before, depressed and sleep deprived, and feel much better today. Even though I was reluctant (nobody wants to hear their baby cry), it was definitely worth it for me.