Sorry, it’s long but I’ll try to keep it short.

I have a brother that’s pushing 40 years old (in September). He hasn’t had a job in many years besides a temp one one this last holiday season. His reasons for not working are because they would take 50% of his income for child support and he says depression and anxiety keep him from being able to keep a schedule. (His words verbatim).

I stopped talking to him back in October because it’s just too much for me, I’ve heard the same stuff from him since we were kids. Also, I have two very young children myself and all that negative all the time is too much. Plus he was never happy with what I had to say to him so he’d get mean at times. He’d only contact me because he’d want something anyway and that gets old fast.

Well, he recently texted me under the guise of wanting to see my son that I had back in November. It turned out he just wanted money. He said he had to move but his car didn’t have enough gas to get from one place to the other. I ended up giving him $10 and followed him to the gas station to make sure he made it ok and I needed gas as well. He put $8 in the car and kept $2 for cheap cigarettes; I don’t care about that, I gave the money so it’s not up to me what he spends it on.

Now a week later he texts saying he ran out of gas in front of the library and is going to get parking tickets if he doesn’t move his car. At this point I’m tired of being used by him for the same shit so I haven’t given him a dime and make excuses as to why I can’t help, the primary reason being I don’t get to the town he lives in often (I live about 30 miles north of where he lives). It’s a total lie, I’ve been there twice in the last week.

I’m just fed up and it’s not like I’m made of money either, I have to budget, but I also work for what I have just like everybody else. He’s more than capable of working, he just won’t and makes excuses.

If you were me, what would you do? Keep “helping”? Tell him to grow up?

(For those wondering, he gets food stamps and he lives in a special housing for those like him, respite housing I think is what it’s called)