Am I wrong to feel sad?

Annie • Lydia Joan♥️ 7•30•20

My husband and I got married in June of 2018, and we started trying end of December beginning of January. I went off the pill and we didn’t use any protection. I’m a bit overweight but everyone who I tell that I feel like I am too big to have kids immediately tells me I’m not. A lot of it’s muscle but because BMI doesn’t calculate it, I’m obese in that set. I got my period and of January and i guess I was... disappointed? I know we just started trying, and I have no right to be disappointed.... but i was. I thought i was going to get lucky right off the bat. To prove to me that I’m not too big to have kids. Also, full disclosure, my husband had issues with one of testicles when he was younger, one went up inside him and had surgery to correct it when he was 8. The doctors just don’t know if it got “fried” or not... and I’m afraid to do the test. Again I was hoping if I got pregnant right off the bat, it would show me that his sperm was good.... I just need reassurance I guess that it was okay to be disappointed