Just looking for people’s thoughts regarding the emotional side of testing early.

Two months ago I had a chemical pregnancy that I would not have known about if I hadn’t tested a couple days before my period was due. I took it harder than I expected and am now struggling with when to test. On the one hand, there is the potential joy of discovering a pregnancy; on the other, the risk of going through it all over again. Does anyone else struggle with this? What do you do?