Baby making causes so much stress!

💙 Hubby and I have been trying for almost 9 years for a baby. I’ve lost two 👼🏻👼🏻....2012 at 6w2d and 2015 at 8w with heartbeat 😢 It’s been extremely hard to get pregnant with my PCOS but I feel that trying for a baby makes it worse. It adds so much stress. We had taken a break for really “trying” for about a year. Wouldn’t time sex, wouldn’t take ovulation tests...nothing. We finally decided to start again this month so I tried pre-seed and clearblue digital ovulation tests. 💑 If the test was right, then I am 10DPO today. Hoping we’re pregnant, I bought some tests tonight while grocery shopping. Of course...I’m such a sucker for those things...I’m a real “pee-on-a-stick-aholic 🤷🏻‍♀️ I came home and took one after only about a two hour hold and it was BFN. 😬 So I of course get all sad and worried and try to find a hint of a line. Then...I get line eyes! 🤦🏻‍♀️👀 and swear I can see something. I sit there trying to get a picture that can capture what I think I see and of course I can’t...so I invert it and do what I can. 🙄 You can see the pic below and see there’s no line but why does my heart keep telling me there is??? 💔 It’s been a long and difficult road for us. We can’t afford IVF and I want so bad to carry a baby of my own so we have to keep trying. I pray for all of you struggling and I ask you pray for me too! 💜🙏🏻