Plus size, pregnant, and kinda insecure 😟

This is my first post and first pregnancy, but I wanted advice or to hear from ladies in my same or similar position. I’m plus sized. At my heaviest, I was 340. With prayer and hard work, I dropped to 265. Got married then leveled out at 275. I’m now 14+5 and was 287 at my last visit. 😓😓😓 I’m devastated and it’s making me feel insecure because all I see is extra, extra fat and knowing that I’ve gained this weight is making it more difficult to be as happy as I want to be.

I’ll admit, my first semester was hard. I was classified as high risk due to heavy bleeding, bed rest, and could only hold down carbohydrates. Like I would literally throw up anything other than a burger or pizza. The doctor said this is normal but this isn’t my normal eating habit, as a result here came 12 extra lbs. Daily I see beautiful plus size women with cute round bellies that haven’t gained a pound; I can’t help but to be a little jealous. 🤦🏾‍♀️ I just want to be beautiful too.

I HAD a lovely coke bottle shape and loved form fitting clothes. I now wouldn’t dare wear my normal wardrobe and embarrass myself with my current body shape. I don’t look pregnant, just “fat”.

Maybe I’m crazy? How did you manage? How did you not gain weight? Is this just a phase?