I have a problem. It's driving a wedge in my relationship. I'm stuck somewhere between "all men masturbate, get over it" and "I don't want him to touch me".

He has this kink- he LOVES prostate massages. He has all these toys, wants me to use them on him- but I find it disgusting. So, I don't (usually).

And these toys- THESE TOYS- Everytime I find his toys stash there is something new there. Butt plugs, small dildos, Pspot vibrators, you name it. The newest thing was coconut oil in our bathroom. That's lube. WHY does he like this? :(

I mean, I know why- it feels good, but JESUS. does he need every toy in the world??

I actually found his stash because I was trying to get on board, and buy him a toy for Xmas, so MAYBE we could meet in the middle somewhere.

I'm the girl that found some kinky ass shit- the "popper" drugs, the anal spreader "device".... He says he's not cheating, I believe him because neither of us have time to cheat... But, like, c'mon, you have to molest yourself everyday? Jesus.

Any advice? Besides leave him? Because, I'm in it for the long haul.

Oh, well, he has told me multiple times, when I point blank asked him, he's not gay. And, I know that the porn he watches is hetero. So, ugh.

For the record, I also hate porn, but know I (and women in general) have to live with it- but this whole thing is such a turn off, that it is making my libido non-existent, which worsens the problem.

And I would like to just get over it, but I need some practical applications on how to do so. :(

I love him SO much, and we have a FANTASTIC relationship otherwise. Like, a relationship that will put any romantic movie to shame, even. I don't want to make him ashamed, he shouldn't be. The problem is me, mostly, I know this and want to work on it. We also have a one year old, and have been married 3 years.