How to approach fiance about bad hygiene?

Question

So my fiance has acquired some terrible hygiene in the last few years. He showers like once a week (if I'm lucky), and when he does he just uses water no soap or shampoo, he'll wear the same pair of underwear for weeks straight, and I cant even remember the last time he brushed his teeth, I just walked into our bedroom after he's been on the phone with a friend for about 20 minutes and actually smells like a fart from him breathing and talking on here for so long.
It has gotten so bad that I just actually cant have sex with him, his balls smell SO badly, and I dont want a dirty penis INSIDE of MY BODY. I don't know how to approach him without him thinking I'm just being a bitch and calling him gross. I just honestly cant take it, he stinks all the time anymore and he used to be such a clean freak. 
Ugh. Help.

Answer

Considering what you’ve explained I think he needs to be told out right that he is gross, its concerning that he’d even have to be told at this point.

Answer

Stopping taking care of your personal hygiene is a common indicator of a change in mental health - could he be depressed? Just thinking if it’s a change in behaviour, maybe it’s an underlying issue that he needs to address?
With the personal hygiene issue, you need to talk to him honestly. You need to say it isn’t healthy, and it’s causing you a lot of worry that he clearly isn’t taking care of himself.

Answer

Ewwwww. I broke up with a guy purely because he wouldn't brush his teeth before bed or wash his hair regularly and wanted to come and push up on me. If a grown ass man can't take care of basic hygiene..nah, gone. Bye.

Answer

I’d just straight up ask him if there’s any reason he hasn’t been showering. Or mention that you went to do laundry and noticed he doesn’t have much. But I think a more direct approach would be better. Something like “I’m not saying this to hurt your feelings, but you smell. You shower once a week and don’t brush your teeth. I want to be intimate with you, but I can’t if you don’t clean yourself. I bought you new soap and shampoo. Can you please use it.”

Answer

Be blunt.
My boyfriend was homeless then lived with white trash people .
He didn't brush his teeth,wear deodorant or shower often.
The first time we met he smelt like body odor so bad,I looked passed it because that can be fixed.
Since living with me I straight up tell him "brush your teeth,floss and use mouth wash" and ill even watch him do it sometimes 😂
I remind him to shower or we take showers together and I will wash his body so I know hes washed right 🤷🏻‍♀️ 
He doesnt mind me being blunt, he appreciates me reminding him and since hes lived here his teeth have got whiter and his gums no longer hurt or bleed.
Honestly if he never changed,I wouldn't stay with him.
I am all about proper hygiene

Answer

I'm sorry but I keep coming to your post and reading the part where you said he was talking to a friend on the phone for 20 minutes and you stepped in and it smelled like a fart from him breathing and talking for so long. ☠☠☠☠☠☠ Like girl, how? How are you still tolerating his scent??

Answer

I would just be blunt, no other way to really go about it. Me and my husband shower together so we have a routine. Maybe get in the shower with him and wash him lol idk. Best way Is to be honest, if he has a problem just tell him that you can’t even have sex with him cause it’s gross and he needs to do something about himself.

Answer

I would consider he may be depressed. Before I knew what depression was I quit showering in college. The idea now disgusts me and I even had blocked this period out but once I got diagnosed with winter depression some previous winters when I did bizarre things came back to me. That winter I quit showering my shower was close to the walk of a couple that were in a physically abusive relationship and they seemed to always be fighting when I would get in there. Eventually I just stopped getting in there. Didn’t think about my hygiene it just didn’t feel like a safe place to me as I had never been around anything like that. I took a bath in the other bathroom sometimes but I just didn’t shower anymore for a while. I can’t imagine what I smelled like or how I didn’t know that something was wrong with what I was not doing but I didn’t. My mind just didn’t register that hygiene was more important than emotional fear.
I have also battled depression when my dad died but I skipped one day of showering and i smelled my armpits and got right up and into the shower and that was the worst time in my life so I know when people quit showering and don’t notice they stink their mind is off somewhere. 
I would tell him he has to shower and find out why he isn’t

Answer

Like someone said a lot of times when someone suddenly stops with hygiene it’s a sign of depression.

Answer

Just tell him straight up that’s nasty. You can get an infection from sex if someone isn’t clean.

How to approach fiance about bad hygiene?

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