PPD let’s talk

Anyone else starting to feel the PPD? I got it with my daughter who’s now 2 and have been on anti depressants ever since. I’m 5 weeks pp and tonight has been the worst. I’ve cried so much and freaked out and I don’t even know. I feel awful and am crying like a crazy person... then I’m fine and then I’m crying again. I’m scared that this will be an ongoing thing and I don’t know what to do. I’m a single mom and I guess it’s all just weighing on me and I’m scared and feel like I can’t give both babies the attention they need . I feel hopeless then I feel like I can do it. I’m so conflicted . Please tell me I’m not alone.