Horrible mother

My baby is almost 2 weeks old and is suppose to be woken up every 2-4 hours (4 being the max) to breastfeed. Lately though I’ve been sleeping through my alarm to wake him and he typically goes anywhere from 3-6 hours before I wake up. I’m such a horrible mother and hate myself so deeply. My baby is counting on me and I’m failing. I’m afraid to tell the pediatrician (I still will) because she is going to be upset I haven’t kept the 2-4 hours thing going like she said. I’ve been balling my eyes out all morning. I feel like I don’t deserve my sweet baby and my husband probably worries about our little baby so much. And he can’t feed him because we’re exclusively breastfeeding right now and my husband works so I am the one who gets up with him throughout the night and during the day. If I wake up like I’m suppose to between feedings, diaper changes, and calming him I’m getting only 4 hours of sleep max. What do I do? 😭😭😭😭😭😭😭