I’m a first time mother and Im also a masters student in science. I graduated from first masters like 9 years ago. In between I was worked and volunteered. I won several awards in presentations, scholarship during these years. I’m 3.9 GPA student. I have plenty of research experiences. I failed at GRE. I tried twice , but got below average scores. But, THAT IS NOT going to determine my knowledge. I want to go for PhD. After baby, everything changed and I couldn’t apply out of state. So, I applied closer. Besides, I have literally applied three times since I moved and having trying to get into phd since my first masters. I literally got nothing. Nothing at all. I got one interview and no results yet but friends got in ( I have seen their profile and not sure if they’re are above me). I did so well in job and phd interviews. Got into nothing. People who are below me getting everything. I’m not belittling but it’s true. I have been in love with science since high school. What’s the point of winning award and having great gpa, publications, research experience. I can’t even get a job to support my family. I want to give up but I need money for survival. I just wanted to vent. I don’t know why it’s happening to me.