High needs babies
I have a beautiful, sweet, perfectly healthy, but very high needs baby. She's been like this since she was born. She was diagnosed with "colic" at 3 weeks, as she cried literally from the moment she was born until she was about 2 1/2 months old. She still cries...a lot. It's gotten easier as the months have gone by, but it's still really really hard. I stay home with her, and I enjoy it so much, but it's incredibly exhausting. As soon as my husband comes home he's right there to jump in and help, and he gets up with her on the weekends. So I'm thankful for that because I know not everyone has that.
But my sweet girl is so needy and emotional. She needs all of my attention and energy all the time. I regularly take her out and expose her to different people and places. She's been around my sisters and mom weekly since she was born. People say, "oh let other people watch her and hold her. She'll get used to it." But she hasn't yet. She cries all the time and wants me to hold her constantly. If I put her down to go pee she screams and cries. Everyone says to "let her cry, she'll get used to it," but it doesn't happen. She isn't "used to it." She cries during my 3 minute shower, when I pee, or when I try to eat something. I do let her cry for these few minutes at a time, because I have to take care of myself, but it doesn't get easier.
She loves me holding her and carrying her around so she can see what I'm doing. But that becomes exhausting. I can wear her, but I don't have a great carrier, so that becomes hard too after a while. She hates sleeping, and still wakes a few times per night. I have held her for every nap of her life. If I put her down she immediately wakes up. If I let her cry nothing happens. She just cries. On one particular day she cried for 5 hours straight because I couldn't hold her. (I comforted her repeatedly but nothing helped.) I don't mind holding her for naps because at least she'll sleep for a little while, and I enjoy snuggling her. But the point there is that even during the day there is no down time away from her. It feels so all consuming and overwhelming at times.
I do absolutely everything to keep her happy, and she is. But it's so difficult. Some days I feel like the life is being drained out of me. She is my absolute pride and joy, and I love her more than words can say, but I never imagined my baby would be like this. I was a nanny for 13 years before having her, and even with that experience, nothing could have prepared me for this.
I'm not complaining, because I love her and am so thankful for her. And I know it won't always be like this. I cherish every day that we have together. But it's still a lot sometimes. I was wondering if there are any other moms out there in a similar boat?
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