The first time I found out I was pregnant I was taken aback, distraught and just not ready. I was worried how others would look at me because I got pregnant out of wedlock! (I’m Christian - and was worried how the church would look at me).

So I took the first abortion pill at the clinic and instantly regretted it. The next day I didn’t take the second set and went to the ER they told me it was a chance that I could still lose the baby, but at the time everything was looking okay. A week later my body ended up miscarrying. Which I totally blame myself for.

However, I recently found out I was pregnant again and I’m keeping this baby, and I don’t care what anyone thinks at this point. But I feel guilty for keeping this child and not keeping the other. And the worst part is that I will be pregnant with this child the month that the other would have been born. And it’s like that month keeps popping up everywhere and other people are having babies that same month. It’s like it’s just more apparent now.

Has this ever happened to anyone? If so how did you deal with it?