My parents are second cousins. Is it so bad?

Question

Oh Glow, the only place I feel comfortable looking for answers. 
I’m from Lebanon and I moved to US few years ago. 
I always knew that cousins marriage isn’t a thing here and is disgusting to Americans. 
However, I just didn’t realize exactly how much of disgust Americans feel about it till I moved here. 
Now, I’m kinda scared to tell my new boyfriend that my parents are second cousins, and don’t know how to even start about it. 
I want to avoid feeling embarrassed about it in front of him. 
Any advice? 
I’m asking because I believe he deserves to know who is he dating. 
Please tell me, is it a big deal?

Answer

It might throw him off, but it wasn’t your decision, so I don’t think he should judge you for it.

Answer

The disgust is associated with the fact that when someone has a child with such a close relative, their child typically have genetic issues. Due to the fact that you’re from a whole different country, he should be understanding to the fact that things are different in Lebanon. My husband is West African and if he told me that when we were dating, I would be surprised and intrigued but I wouldn’t find him gross. I might look at the in laws weird though. Be open and honest!

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I wouldn’t tell him. It’s no ones business but theirs & things are different in other countries.

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The issue that most people have with it is down to the fact that having a child with a relative leaves a chance of genetic issues in the resulting child.
If you do tell him, just try to explain that in your culture it isn’t as big of a deal, but expect him to take a while to come to terms with the information. 
I personally wouldn’t tell him 🤷🏻‍♀️

Answer

Even in America we have a term for 2nd cousins. It is "Kissing Cousins". We call them that because 2nd cousins are far enough removed from each other genetically that the odds of having issues from inbreeding is much smaller, so therefore it is "safe".
Culturally we have moved away from accepting this idea as socially acceptable behavior.. but that doesn't necessarily mean it is wrong. America is not the end all be all of the world morality police (even if we sometimes like to pretend we are)...

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If he likes you enough it won’t put him off enough to stop dating you. 
And if something like that did put him off enough would you really want to date him anyway? 
Don’t be ashamed or embarrassed by it, different cultures accept different things.

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Just let it be no need to even say anything

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You want him to know who he’s dating so you want to tell him your parents are cousins????  Girl how does that make sense?  Are you different because you’re parents are cousins?  Uh nooooo. Your parents being cousins doesn’t tell a person shit about you. Cousins or not, they’re just your parents and that’s how you should introduce them to him. Them being cousins may never come up and if it does I can’t see it changing the way he sees you. I know I wouldn’t look at my man any differently if I found out his parents were cousins.

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It’s not like it’s something you can change or decided. Second cousins isn’t as bad as first cousins... it is what it is. Don’t be ashamed I mean... what’s the point? If I loved a guy in this was the case, it wouldn’t change anything... I would just want to know if genetically there is something that could be more likely in future children. Chances are greater in some cases, but realistically that’s not a major concern.

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I mean if you don’t need to tell him don’t. But you can always say in your culture it’s more acceptable. Since you are not from the US that may help to soften the blow to him. If it’s a huge deal to him then he’s not worth the time. We all have baggage just depends on what it is.