At 36 weeks, I was 2 cm dilated, 80% effaced, and my son’s head was really, really low. At 37 weeks I was only 2.5 cm dilated. I was so sore and uncomfortable after that cervix check that on Monday at my 38 week appointment, I declined to be checked. My doctor mentioned that she thought I had dropped, although he had always been pretty low throughout my whole pregnancy.

On Wednesday morning November 28, I lost my mucous plug but tried not to get too excited because I knew that didn’t mean labor was imminent. I went to work, felt completely fine, no contractions, some aching in my lower back but nothing out of the ordinary. Came home for work and watched TV until my husband came home, then we went to his hockey game at 6:30. Sat through the game with my mother-in-law and chatted, very typical Wednesday evening. Game ended at 7:40, I stood up and felt a pop and a small gush like I had just gotten my period. I went to the bathroom while his mom waited for us in the foyer. There was a decent amount of clear fluid, but not a lot. I stood up, walked out of the stall, and felt another gush, this time like I had peed my pants. Went back into the stall and my pantyliner was completely soaked. Cleaned up what I could and headed back out, still in denial. While my husband and I walked to the car, he asked if I wanted to go out with his teammates as is the weekly tradition. I told him that I thought we should go home and finish packing our hospital bags because I think my water broke. This didn’t seem to phase him, he just said okay and drove home.

When we got home, I pulled together the last few things between some uncomfortable contractions and worsening back pain. I showered quick because I didn’t know when I would get to shower again and laid down in the recliner with a heating pad on my lower back. The contractions were painful, but nothing compared to the back pain. It felt like someone was literally ripping my hips apart. I started timing them while my husband called his mom (an RN, head of the surgery department at the hospital where we both work) to come over; contractions were 4-5 minutes apart. My husband then made a pizza and opened a beer. I don’t like listening to people eat as it is, but omg, I swear he couldn’t have eaten that crispy thin crust pizza any louder 😂 Finally I told him to take the pizza into the spare bedroom and find the bag of travel toiletries that I knew were in there somewhere and that I DO NOT want to hear him munching that pizza AGAIN! Haha. I’m sure he thought I had absolutely lost it, and I honestly don’t know why it made me so angry, it just did. 🤷🏼‍♀️

My in-laws arrived and my contractions were about 2-3 minutes apart. I was timing them on my phone and thought my MIL could see what I was doing, but maybe not? She said she was going to go to the hospital (15 minutes away) and get the test strips to see confirm if it was amniotic fluid and would be back. I was a little nervous since my contractions were so close and it would take her at least 30 minutes to get there and back. She got back and said, “Good news, your doctor is on call tonight!” At that point, I didn’t care who delivered the baby as long as it was a doctor, but it was a tiny bit comforting 😂 I tested the fluid, it was confirmed amniotic fluid, and when I was testing the fluid I had my bloody show. At this point I am barely able to speak through the contractions and have to bend over and lean against something to try to ease the pain in my hips. My mother-in-law, God bless her, is rubbing my back and telling me to picture myself somewhere else, in my happy place. Breathe through the pain, go to my happy place. Speaking in soft, soothing tones and trying to be calm. I’m sure that’s helpful to some, but omg, it didn’t help me 😂 I was planning/hoping to have a natural, unmedicated birth, but she’s telling me not to be afraid of or too proud to get an epidural. All I could say was, “Nope, I definitely would like one.” (My husband, ever the jokester, told his mom, “She’s not getting one, we got the hospital estimate for a natural birth, we can’t afford an epidural!” Ha ha. 🙄)

My mother-in-law is not one to sugarcoat things (neither am I, so this is something that I like most about her) so as we are slowly making our way to the front door, she’s telling me what to expect. “It’s goin to get a hell of a lot worse before it gets better. Most people throw up when they reach about 4 cm. Don’t be surprised or discouraged if you’re only 1 cm dilated when you get there.” I managed to tell her I was 2.5 cm a week and a half ago. We called my mom, told her to come get our dog, and his mom called the hospital to tell them we were heading in. My husband was trying to find the iPad (as it’s one of the things people suggest you bring, since labor will be long) and I finally said, “F it, we need to go!” The ride in is a blur of rough roads (I swear we hit every pothole on the way in) and contractions one minute apart.

At 10 pm, my husband dropped me off at the ER doors and went to park the car. I swear the boy behind the desk was 15 years old. He asked me if I felt like I needed to push and I said yes. He continued with other questions and then a woman popped out of an office and said, “She needs to push, that stuff can wait!” and called for a wheelchair. We were rushed up to OB and into a room. They help me into my gown, get me into bed, and check me. I’m 6 cm. I fill out the paperwork for an epidural while they ask me tons of questions. I managed to answer them between contractions. Another nurse popped in to say that my doctor was aware that I was admitted. They checked me again and I was an 8. As I’m laying there in extreme pain, my husband and the nurse are becoming best buds across my bed. 😂 She asked what he does for work and he says he’s an ag mechanic. She asks what he works on and he says, “I work primarily on Claas choppers. It’s a self-propelled forage harvester.” I couldn’t speak, but I remember this moment in time and I wanted to scream, “SHE DOESN’T KNOW WHAT THAT IS! JUST SHUT UP!” (Later I learned that she knew exactly what that was, and that he knew her family. 😂)

The second nurse came in again and told us that they called my doctor again and she was on her way in. They checked me again and I’m at 9 cm. I heard the one quietly say to the other, “I don’t think she’s going to get that epidural.” I wanted to scream, “SHUT UP, I CAN HEAR YOU 😭😭😭!” But I knew enough to know that I wasn’t going to get it either. I was going to get my natural birth whether I wanted it or not. My husband said at this point the nurses seemed a little panicky thinking my doctor wouldn’t make it in time. I was oblivious to everything, just so consumed by the pain. My doctor made it around 10:45 pm and shortly after I started pushing, and I think that was the last time I opened my eyes until my son was born.

Truthfully, I don’t remember much after this point. My husband says I was very loud and that the poor new mom in the next room probably heard everything. I don’t remember being loud, although I vaguely remember a nurse saying something like, “Use your breath to push the baby out, don’t waste energy/breath making noise.” Nurse speak for “shut up.” 🤷🏼‍♀️ Literally could not help it. My husband also said he could hear it when I tore, and he felt it in the leg that he was holding. Glad I don’t remember that 😳 It was all just a blur of pain.

At 11:21 pm on November 28, 2018, they placed my tiny little boy on my stomach, pink and screaming. It felt like minutes before I could force myself to open my eyes and look at him. My first words to him were, “I don’t know why you’re so upset, that was way more traumatic for me than it was for you!” 🤣 My next words were, “I’m sorry, but you’re going to be an only child.”

The nurses took him to the warmer, got him cleaned up and measured and weighed while my doctor stitched me up. I had a second degree tear and got 16 stitches, lucky me. Truly the worst part of the whole pregnancy and labor was recovering from the tear. They popped me in the whirlpool tub and told me to call for a nurse if I needed help. When I was done, I tried to get out on my own and felt a little lightheaded, so I sat down on the side of the tub and called for the nurse. Two nurses and my husband helped me dry off and walk to the bed. I fainted next to the bed and came to sitting on the floor with a nurse in my face 😂 Oops.

I’m not sure that anything could’ve prepared me for how fast it all went. From my water break at 7:40, getting to the hospital at 10, and having a baby in my arms by 11:21, it all went so quickly. The nurses kept saying that I was made to have babies, and they told my husband, “Good thing you watched, now you know what to do for the next one!”

At 11:21 pm on November 28, 2018, 12 days before his due date, weighing 7 pounds, 6 ounces, and 20.5 inches long, our little Bennett Lee entered this world and changed our lives completely.

We couldn’t imagine our lives without this happy, smiley, beautiful, perfect little boy 💙💙💙