I don’t know

I’m not sure if this is me asking for advice or just getting it off my chest. But I feel I love and unwanted. Ik god love me and I get that. But I just turn 21 and I’m just wondering will I be alone forever. Every relationship I get in, it doesn’t last. I thought I can just do the friends with benefits but it doesn’t work for me. I’m just wondering if I’m ugly and that’s why I’m also in the friend zone. Not saying this for y’all to feel sorry for me. But it just been heavy on my chest. I want someone that’ll love me just for me. I see my friends in relationships and I get jealous cause when will it be my turn. I get self love…but it gets tiring. I don’t want to be alone forever.