So I’m a nanny to a sweet little 9 month old girl. I had a miscarriage about a month ago at the end of February. I was 12 weeks along. This was the first pregnancy for both my husband and I and was suppose to be the first grand-baby for both sets of parents. It’s been pretty rough for me just trying to move on.

So far being a nanny to a little one has been surprisingly more of a help than a hindrance. I know that sounds bad but I just mean that I thought it would be much more difficult to be around her than it actually is. Today I took her on a walk in the stroller (first time) and I was stunned at the wave of guilt that hit me. It sounds dumb and makes no sense but I felt like I was almost ‘cheating’ on my lost baby. Please tell me I’m know the only one that’s ever felt like this.