*WARNING* I don’t sugarcoat things so if you get offended by blunt language then I’m sorry lol.

Anyways, my boyfriend and I have been dating for almost a year. I’ve only had one other relationship, and it was with the guy that I lost my virginity to when I was 19, so we didn’t do much exploration in the sexual realm, and he didn’t ever really ask me to perform oral on him. My current boyfriend, however, loves giving and receiving oral. He’s always willing to eat me out, and actually mentions frequently how much he enjoys it. I, however, do not like performing oral sex. I do it, of course, because I know he enjoys it. I never express to him that i dislike giving him head, because he does it for me all the time so i just feel like I should please him the way he pleases me. Tonight, however, was very different. You see, I’ve never sucked my boyfriend start to finish. I’ll either start giving him head for a few minutes and then we proceed to have intercourse, or I finish him off after we have had intercourse. Tonight, I’m on my period and I did not want to have sex, but my boyfriend was particularly horny. I didn’t want to deny him sexual pleasure because i love him and i want to please my man, so i told him i would give him head. I’ve never attempted to give him head start to finish like that, but he was very enthusiastic about the idea. I proceeded to perform oral sex on my boyfriend, and he was enjoying it very much, so i felt good too. But after a while, my jaw got terribly tired and my teeth were rubbing my lips raw. I continued anyways, and 10 minutes went by. He was loving every second but i was dying inside lmao 😂 After 15 minutes and him not finishing yet, i tried to finish him off with my hand because my mouth couldn’t do it any longer. My boyfriend has never been into handjobs, but i thought i would try it. It didn’t work. He saw that I was tired, so he said “Baby, you don’t have to keep going. I enjoyed it.” Sweet right? Well immediately i started crying because I don’t know a girl that can’t get her man to cum from a blow job. I was embarrassed and disappointed in myself, despite him comforting me. Am I being dramatic, or do you all think i have a valid reason to be upset with myself? I just want to please my man the way he pleases me and i feel like i failed at that tonight.