My husband cheated on me a week after I gave birth. While I was in labor, his face replays in my head. He looked at me as if I was annoying him. The birth was natural. No pain meds. Nothing.

I have a 4 month old that was unplanned, I do NOT have a bond with her. I could go as far to say I strongly dislike her. I feel nothing but anger when I look at her. My 18 month old, I love and adore. Tried years for her.

I don't want my 4 month old. Never have. I've tried finding people who relate to me. In this position that I am with their husband and 2nd child.

I've discussed to my husband that I'm thinking about just taking my 18 month old and he can have the 4 month old.

There is so much more to this. But, this is something I battle with daily. I wish I knew why I feel the way that I do.