Does it make me a bad person..

Question

If I don’t want my mom in the room with me while giving birth? This is my first pregnancy and may be my only, I kind of just want it to be me and my husband only. Does that make me a bad person? She has already even said “you know I HAVE to be in the room, since I have seen all my grandkids born.” I don’t know, I just want it to be a special moment with just mommy and daddy. Any of you not have your mom in there or who of you didn’t. Pros and cons?!?

Answer

I didn’t. It’s your baby and your body. You’re going to be all out on display so you need to be as comfortable as possible. Have that special moment with just the three of you because you deserve it. 9 months of pregnancy plus labor and delivery definitely means you deserve it exactly the way you want it.

Answer

I didn’t and I don’t regret it one bit. I got to focus in on my husband and my new little baby! It was amazing! If my mom were there I wouldn’t have been as comfortable and I would have my attention divided even more. Do what makes you comfortable, you might have to hurt some feelings but you’re the one who’ll be pushing out the baby!

Answer

With my first I requested that nobody be at the hospital even waiting. I didn’t want the pressure of knowing people were waiting for a baby to be born. I wanted the moment to be between my husband and I. We told friends and family that we would let them know when she was born and when we wanted visitors. 
Having a baby, and getting little to no sleep for the first 48 is exhausting. We had maybe 4 visitors because I just wanted to rest and adjust to nursing and being a mom in general. 
This is your guys private moment and journey. Don’t let anyone feel entitled to trample on special intimate moments, it only happens once. Just gently let her know your birth experience is going to be private.

Answer

I'm only having my fiancé in the room with me, everyone else can visit after babys born!

Answer

No, you’re not a bad person. It’s YOUR day. I’m super close to my mom and don’t want her there, because I want it to be our lil family. 
Your moms response is concerning- she obviously feels entitled and that it’s about her. Sorry hon, it’s not. She probably won’t take it well but too bad, it’s not about her. Don’t feel guilt. It’s your day, your baby, your body.

Answer

I only had my husband in the room. We didn’t even tell anyone I was in labour until she’d arrived. Having that time as a new family was really important and I was a state too. I needed a bath and to be stitched up and dressed before I could handle other people!

Answer

I didn’t with my first and won’t be again. My mum said she would just turn up at the hospital and I said I would ask hospital to turn her away. She got the message. I didn’t feel mean at all - it is the most special time for you and your partner and one you can never recreate. I actually wish we had waited even longer before having any visitors of any kind as they just burst your magical, amazing bubble!

Answer

I am SUPER close with my mom and I'm still not sure if I want her in there with me. Don't feel bad, you have awhile to decide.

Answer

I will say this- I had the exact same thought as you. Buttt my mom ended up being in the room along with my little sister- and it was awesome. They were so helpful. My mom just understood the things that I needed and was able to film my husband cutting the umbilical cord and delivering our son. So- you might change your mind! But it’s totally great either way 💛

Answer

Not at all! You are the person who makes that call and don’t let anyone try to persuade you to do something you don’t want too. Your mother is not entitled just because she’s your mom and has see all her other grandkids born. Not everyone wants even more people staring at their vagina than there has to be. And I am totally with you. I feel like birth is such a special thing between your and your spouse. My first pregnancy it was only my husband in with me and it will be the same this time. It’s our time to bond and see our beautiful baby ourselves without all the extra people.

Does it make me a bad person..

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