NO EPIDURAL & HEMORRHAGE 🤧😦
Since 36 weeks I’ve had consistent Braxton Hicks contractions sometimes 5 mins apart. So by the time I was 40+1 I was convinced baby girl was just gonna stay extra long. BUT I woke up at 1 with mild period like cramps and I thought “today might be the day” since I never felt contractions like that the whole pregnancy or my previous pregnancy. I went back to sleep though thinking it was prob just false as usual 🤷🏽♀️. Then I woke up again at 3 and realized today might really be the day so I texted my doula and let her know and then ran a nice hot bath that I sat in for an hour. When the contractions kept coming I told my doula I was ready for her to come and I woke up my husband to have him help me until she came. My doula came to the house around 5am and we started timing contractions they were about 10 mins apart depending on which position I was in. But let me tell you... the techniques she used to counter pressure and relieve pain worked like magic. We used the heating pad for a good while then around 8 I got in the shower and things really picked up. I was contracting about every 4-5 mins and they were INTENSE. we didn’t know it at the time but I was in transition so everytime my husband or doula tried to touch me during the contractions I was in such pain I couldn’t let them touch me. At this point my doula looked concerned she was ready to go to the hospital. HOWEVER if I was planning on delievering naturally I wanted to arrive ready to push so I held out a little longer and laid on the bed with the heating pad for another half hour. Then we switched to the toilet seat and LET. ME. TELL. YOU. I was ready to go get that epidural when the contraction hit while I was sitting on the toilet seat. I gave my doula such a betrayed look. Like how could she suggest such a position. 😩 at this point I was in tears and contractions were about 2-3 mins apart. I told everyone we needed to go now. When we got to labor and delievery they checked me in so fast because they saw how quick together contractions were and how painful they were. The midwife came in immediately and checked my dilation.
I was a 9.5!!!!! Oh.My.Gosh I was so relieved they rushed me to a delivery room and allowed me to labor in any position I chose while my husband and doula supported me. THEN my WORST NIGHTMARE happened. I started to feel the urge to poop. I told them all and they reassured me that was baby. But I knew... I knew it was really poo and with the next contractions I just couldn’t help myself. I felt like a caged animal in the corner. Mind you I was naked because I needed to be comfortable 🤷🏽♀️. I let it rip. All while looking terrified at my husband and doula and apologizing to the midwife who all kept assuring me that it’s normal and completely okay. But In the back of my mind I was convinced my mother and mother in law secretly plotted on feeding me curry to get labor started while they were in town 🤔 Anyways. So contractions were now every minute and I was then begging for the epidural I even gave my doula our safe word but they said it was too late. My water finally broke with the next contraction and I didn’t think they could get worse but they did 🤦🏽♀️. I was screaming with every contraction. I couldn’t get in a comfortable position for the life of me. They put a squat bar on the bed so I was standing on the bed holding the bar screaming with each contraction I’m sure I looked so crazy. The midwife offered to check me again but I was still just a 9.5 I begged her to get the baby out of me. She offered to reach in and pull my cervix forward but I had to push with all my might when she did and I jumped on that offer real quick 😁
It wasn’t painful I was more concentrated on ending the whole experience. So she when she did that the baby’s head dropped into the canal and she jump up and started getting dressed telling me to wait but I felt the REAL pushing urge this time. The relief I felt being able to push was indescribable UNTIL I realized I had to overcome the ring of fire 🔥. At first I thought the midwife was assisting me with her fingers stretching my Perinium around baby’s head so I’m screaming at her to stop touching me and everyone looks at me showing me their hands I was in disbelief. I could feel EVERYTHING as my poor vagina slowly stretched open to accommodate baby’s head. The midwife and nurse kept telling me to push with all I had however I was so scared... I was so so so scared so I was pushing little at a time with each contraction. I felt the babies head coming out slowly but when it got to the thickest part. I had a true INNERSTANDING of the ring of fire. I felt it all and I knew that was my body’s way of telling me to slow down to prevent tearing so I held off until the next contraction and I pushed like I had an epidural in 😂 and her head popped out. I was so happy and shocked.
Then everything happened so quickly. The midwife looked at me so seriously and told me I need to push with all my might RIGHT NOW. then everyone was screaming at me and I didn’t understand what was going on. Then two nurses came out of no where and we’re literally on top of my stomach pushing while my legs were straight up in the air. I can’t describe the horrible animal screams that escaped my body. I’m sure every person in the unit was like 🤯. It was so painful. Baby girls shoulders were a little stuck so they had to twist her on out and jump on my tummy. But she came out and onto my chest. My husband looked so proud of me. I will never forget the look in his eyes
So as we’re enjoying skin to skin I push out my placenta with the next contractions
Which I kept and am encapsulating 👍🏽
After that they beginning “massaging my uterus to help it contract down and watch for hemorrhaging. This btw was painful asf hence the faces
They did it while my husband cut the chord hoping to distract me 🤨 which clearly didn’t work. After a few mins I just kept feeling gush after gush of blood escaping me and the nurses began to panic. They called back the midwife and they made me give my hubby the baby while they began working on me. I was so dehydrated they poked me... no exaggeration 14 times trying to find a vein to draw blood from for labs. I was so dehydrated they just kept blowing. I got three different shots to try and stop the bleeding. At this point I’m just laying there I didn’t have much energy to talk to do anything but watch my husband and baby enjoying each other on the other side of the room while my doula stayed by me reassuring me and comforting me. The nurses kept digging into my stomach doing these uterus “massages” that had me begging them in tears to stop. Then the midwife tells me she’s going to have to reach inside of me to check for rupture and clots in my uterus 🤦🏽♀️😳 at this point I just can’t with life. They offer me iv pain medication to take the edge off. But all it did was make me sleepy and a yes man to whatever needed to be done. 20 seconds after the iv meds they hold me down as the midwife reaches inside of me 😢 but it was quick I don’t remember much pain but she said everything was fine and the shots should begin working. She checked me twice for tearing and I was perfectly intact 👍🏽🙌🏽 at least something good! Baby weighed 9lbs 11oz 😳 by the time all of this was finished it was 5pm. Baby was born at 1pm.
The experience was traumatizing but not in a negative way. I can’t explain it but I DID IT 👍🏽 and we went home the next day healthy as can be