When I was little my dad would beat my brother and I. He would take out everything on us. Now that he’s older he can’t physically hurt me and now he just controls me and mentally shuts me down. My brother ran away and is now dead and I haven’t been able to handle it well and he won’t allow me to properly grieve because if I look upset or angry or anything other than complacent he gets angry and yells at me and tells me to lose the attitude or else he grounds me. And even though his groundings have gone from one month being the least and three years being the most, it’s better than him hitting me. I’ve started to try and get out of the house and get involved in stuff and I do sports but I’m now not allowed to hang out with friends or anything and he told me I can’t try out for a play because rehearsal would go late and he’s “getting real close to uncomfortable” with me being gone everyday. And my mom can’t do anything about it or else he’ll hurt her and she can’t leave because he made her drop out of college so she could cook for him when he got home from class so she wouldn’t be able to support us. He also has this theory that my phone is the root of all my problems and that I over exaggerate everything. When I tell him I’m having a problem he says that he’s going to take my phone because I don’t know how to use it. I also have time restrictions on it and it only works about 3 hours a day, which has left me not being able to contact someone when I needed to more times than I can count. I don’t want to Be the kind of person who self diagnosis themselves, but I feel weighted and suicidal. I feel like I’m slowing rotting away at home and I can’t reach out to anyone or else he’ll get angry. Do you have any advice?