Sorry for the long rant but this is the only place I can get this out....
My MIL has been driving me bonkers with her "suggestions" ever since my daughter was born (5 weeks ago). If it's not suggestions its questioning my way of doing things.
For instance... when my daughter was less than a week old me my husband and his mother were sitting in the living room talking and my husband had the baby on his chest. He was starting to doze and I told him "if you are going to take a nap put her down in her chair" his mother looks at me and says "why" I swear I about lost it and it took everything in me to reply nicely but sternly "uh because if he falls asleep holding her she could slip out of his arms and fall off the couch" she just laughed it off and said "oh you would be surprised you would notice her falling and wake up" I just muttered something and walked away. thankfully my husband listened to me.
But it's been like this since jump... "has she had another bath since I left?" "You need to put vaseline on the red spot (baby acne) on her cheek or itll get worse" "wipe her front to back or shell get an infection" "you need to leave the house without her to itll be good for you" "she doesnt like tummy time because the blanket you use is getting in her face" "are you washing her clothes separately" (in response to showing her a picture with her baby acne). "Shes bored. Probably needs something to look at" (in response to me stating that I let her sit in her rocker and cry)
And.... she told my husband that she wanted to hire someone to help me once I go back to work to help me with the baby and the housework..m while yes it is a very kind gesture shes doing way too much. All of her "suggestions" are unsolicated and come across condescending. Yes I am a new mother but I'm almost 28 years old. I will figure out how to do this my way.
She has never been rude or accusatory or made me intentionally feel like a bad mother. my husband also stood his ground and told her that we want to figure things out for ourselves and that we will ask for help when we need it.
I could handle all of this if I was actually asking for advice or suggestions but it's all just out of the blue. It makes me not want to send her pictures or updates about my daughter. But then I feel bad because she lives so far away and doesnt get to see her grandchild often. It just seems to happen every other day I send a picture I get some sort of response
Rant over... thanks for reading 😊