Super anxious

Like everyone else here I feel pregnant every month. every craving is a sign of pregnancy, every pain is a sign of pregnancy. I dread the days that I use the restroom and wipe faint blood away letting me know unwelcome aunt flo is here. I have 2 kids but my heart yearns for one more. a boy? a girl? who knows. as long as it has 10 fingers and toes. So today according to bestfriend Glow, I should have started 2 days ago. i ordered a 25 pack of testing strips from Amazon. they should be at my house tomorrow. I'm so scared of the results I'll see. the happiness and anxiousness if its positive. the sadness and hopelessness if its negative. these mind games. so if you will please sprinkle a little baby dust my way. I'll be sure to return the favor