I have pcos and need to lose at least 3 1/2 stone to go on fertility meds. I feel so down about this and I feel like a failure and a loser. I hate myself every single day and I often wonder why my partner even loves me as he could be with someone so much better than me who doesn’t have any of these issues.

We have been ttc for 10months which isn’t even a long time but it feels like a long time to me and every negative test I get I feel more and more like a total fat useless idiot

All I seem to do is put off losing weight and dieting because i feel so down that I just go fuck it I’ll have some chocolate to feel better! It’s a vicious cycle and I hate myself.

No one really understands it and I feel on my own a little bit despite having loads of support at home and work. I just feel a little lost and I’m bitterly scared I’ll never get pregnant and I’ll be fat and disgusting forever. I feel so bitter to all of these women who don’t even have a stable life and just fall pregnant like it’s nothing- I judge them even though its so nasty and not my place to judge but I can’t help it as they have what I desperately want! I honestly feel like a terrible person for it

I just feel lost today! Needed a little rant with someone who’s not going to tell me I’m being silly or god is doing this for a reason 😒

I hate myself and I feel so bad for my partner! I’m a fat disgusting mess and I need to sort my shit out asap but I’m stuck in the cycle of self hatred and anxiety and feeling worthless! The never ending negativity cycle 😔

I just started using ovusense to help and I will go on a diet of some sort, but I still feel so anxious and negative atm so I’m still doing absolutely nothing about my weight and not even giving the ovusense a chance to work without thinking it’s not going to work and im wasting my time! Honestly having anxiety just makes ttc even harder and I’m losing my mind over it I’m so sick and tired of feeling like this I just needed to rant and vent so I don’t take it out on my partner or my mother. Sorry for rambling, but I’d rather post on here and no one even bother to read it as it makes me feel like someone is listening. I really hope that things get better but atm it feels like it never is and I’ll be fat and ugly and baron forever.

And btw fuck first response and their shitty indent lines- got a faint line Monday and absolutely nothing today because it was an indent and like and idiot I actually thought I did it- hence why I feel so shit today 😒 #rantover #sorryladies