We got back from the daycare. I got my daughter down (I have twins) and he started throwing his tantrums. He wanted to sit in the driver seat and I didn't allow him. He ran on the driveway, fell and started crying. I went to pick him up, he didn't like the idea so he ran away from the driveway straight on to the road. And...a car was coming. Luckily, our house is on top of the hill, the lady was driving slowly and stopped really quickly. I lost it. I picked him up and hit him on his back. It was pretty involuntary. I couldn't stop shaking for few minutes after that. Tell me I am not terrible.

Edit: Ladies, thank you very much for your wonderful responses. I totally understand some comments here and I am perfectly fine with different opinions. First off, I would like to tell you that I was never ever spanked as a child and I hate hitting kids. I never do that. My kids are in their terrible twos. They will turn 3 in July so you can imagine what I have been going through for 10 months. And never did I spank. My son has been running in the parking lots and I told him multiple times why it's not ok to do so. But this time, it got very real. He was few steps away from a car. For those saying they would be composed in that situation, good for you. I am not sure if you were ever there , your kid was about to be knocked down by a car, God forbid! I grabbed him at his shoulders, picked him up and hit him at the top of the back near shoulders (not hurting kidneys and it wasn't even a hard hit). He has been spitting milk, hitting, pinching and pulling my daughter's hair, throwing toys across the room but I never hit him. It was a shock and fear, fear for 2 reasons. And this is always there. 1. What if something happened? He was really close. 2. What if my daughter followed him and ran on to the road? I am always scared of one kid left unattended when I am attending another. Hitting on the back was a reaction. If I was in a position to decide between bum and back, I wouldn't do it in the first place!

I did talk to him about it later. Until he told me he wouldn't do it. I explained the consequences and that mommy was worried.

Big thanks to everyone for your honest opinions!