Am I one of “those” mothers???

Question

We have 2 children 4 and 3 weeks old. 
He wants to see the children more than the currently arranged 1 hour a week at a local swimming pool. 
He’s a drug addict (Cocaine), extremely manipulative. Has lied to me about taking the children to places they aren’t allowed-due to drug use-
He has previously put our then 3 year old in the car with no car seat because he couldn’t be bothered to strap it in (it was in the trunk of his car) 
He drink drives. He has been to prison prior to meeting me for dealing drugs (large quantities) 
He has (without my initial knowledge) done drugs infront of the children. 
And agreed to watch our 4 day old baby while on drugs too and only told me after I had left them together while I showered that he was in fact on them. 
I’m unsure of how to proceed. I don’t want to be “one of those mothers” who stops the dad seeing the kids. And he pressures me and makes me feel guilty. 
But I’m so uncomfortable with it. Advice please!!!! 
I’m just after confirmation that I’m not being unreasonable. Or if you think I am?

Answer

You are not. You need to do what you feel is best for your babies.

Answer

Hell no.. supervised visitation should be all he gets until he is sober living. Drugs change a person to do unimaginable things.. he may in fact love his children with all his heart and that does mean something but you still should protect them. I would rather be considered "one of those mothers" than have my child hurt or God forbid worse.. I go through a similar situation and his family is so quick to call me names for "keeping his child from him" and in fact he hasn't called in 7 months due to his drug use. I just let the comments roll off because I know my son is alive and safe because I'm "one of those mothers". You are the only voice for your children so speak up when you feel it's necessary. Good luck momma!! 🙌

Answer

You are one of those mothers. One who protects her children. One who has to make tough choices so her kids don't suffer the consequences. One of the strong ones. Don't let him tell you otherwise.

Answer

I think it’s way worse to be “one of those mothers who doesn’t protect their children” 
Hell to the double no he wouldn’t be seeing my kids. Protect those babies

Answer

Definitely not one of "those" mothers. He is putting your children's life at risk. I would do supervised visits or none at all.

Answer

As someone who grew up with a drug addicted father I don’t think you’re horrible for wanting less/no visitation. Drug addicted parents do nothing but causing childhood trauma, makes you and your children feel bad and it’s just not worth it. If he gets clean and get help for his manipulative ways then reconsider.

Answer

My ex husband was prescribed some anxiety medication and it conflicted with another one he was taking. He was basically losing his mind and his behavior was getting dangerous, based on what his live in girlfriend told me. He was admitted several times to inpatient mental facilities. 
I issued a temporary stop in visitation until it was sorted out and he was cleared by a physician. Everyone on his side thought I was trying to take our daughter away from him and being an “opportunist” but he was truly sick and I wasn’t willing to risk my daughter’s safety no matter what other people thought. Luckily, he’s much better now.

Am I one of “those” mothers???

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