I had my hopes up for help, just to have them crushed again. They handed me a pamphlet and said we would set up a surgery for next week after I was done talking to the doctor about what they found on my ultrasounds. He was 30 minutes late because of rain traffic, rushed in and barely looked at my chart, said both of my ovaries have cysts, I need to lose weight, and he isn’t going to do the surgery. The nurse looked super confused when he told her to set up another sonogram for 6 months, and I am shattered. I am tired of fighting. I just want the pain to stop and someone to help me. I FOUGHT to see this doctor, and he had me so hopeful after seeing him a couple weeks ago. It’s hard as hell to get Tricare to send you anywhere other than the military hospital.

Apparently getting pregnant will make endometriosis and my cysts go away. Except- I have two kids and have had these pains that are progressively getting worse since I was at least 12. I’m also having one hell of a time getting pregnant. We’ve been trying. The last time I got pregnant ended in a miscarriage in June 2017.

I’m apparently not in enough pain for endo, even though my old docs that I ended up moving away from (Illinois) had agreed that it was highly likely, but they wanted to do birth control and Motrin to treat it. Having sex hurts, I pass clots the size of my fist on my period, and my pains drop me to the floor when they hit.

Motrin and Naproxen apparently make symptoms worse and are what is most likely causing my clots (what???).

All in all. I give up. This was a doc I was recommended by a friend with endo. He has done numerous surgeries for her. All I want is a lap, but because I am ONLY 32, nobody wants to do one. I want some answers and some relief. I want help! I can’t keep living like this!

Maybe I really am crazy and it’s all just in my head.