So lately i feel like shit.. Literally like shit, just dropped off my dad from airport and I miss my dad very much he comes once in a while to see me and my son( grandson) and I feel like home with my dad he is really helpful and supportive.. 😞

But anyway.. 38 mins on my way home driving the back road. I live in Colorado..

So driving listening to music and listening to hasely- without me

And im sitting in the car thinking so much what is goin through my head... Im thinking... For some reason i feel like my husband is cheating on me and i felt like he wasn't ready to with me and wasn't ready to marry me at the first place... Hes in the military..

Its like I love him and i hate him and i hate that i love him and i care but at the sametime im like... Fuck why should I give a fuck about him.. If hes doing something wrong?😞😢

1 he doesnt wear our wedding 💍

2. He thinks about him self

3. Always constantly on his cell phone texting ..🤳

4. He doesn't show love affection..💑

5. He threw away our family picture from his wallet he says " we have lots of pictures." And he also threw away a picture of me from his wallet.

6. Bought him a rubber ring because he says he doesnt wear " jewelry" and he doesn't wear the rubber ring ither?

7. He is only loving at night

8. He ignores me when i try to talk to him.about stuff important convos

Deep inside from my heart im crying out for help and I've talked to him millions of times.. He never listens😢😞😞

I just feel like I'm getting used and he wants me around for a reason

He doesnt like to be lonely? He told me that before?😕

He put more important objects first then his own family.. He didnt seem concern about our son when he had an ear infection he just thinks taking our son to a doctor they wont do shit?

I barely ever see him change or watch the baby? Or he doesn't seem to be a caring father.

He provides for us ok dont get me wrong. But the love and bond is important too? I mean isn't that called love? Or not?😢

I feel like a piece of shit sitting around taking care of his shit and were moving and i stay home as a mother. I cook and clean? What else does he need ? 😩😞

Idk if im being a cry baby about it but I feel like im asking for him from him and he doesn't see it.. I dont tell him anything anymore because I feel like it just waste of air and time. My poor son loves playing with his dad and sometimes his dad doesn't give attention as much. 😞😞😞😭

My husband cares about money, worrying about our old house and our new house coming soon. His job. He just puts everything all at once on his plate when he should do things step by step 1 at a time. 😨

I understand he does a lot. But i feel like the love and bonding is breaking us apart? I don't even want to have S.e.x with him because how i feel I feel empty .. He wants to make love but i feel like he just stress and that's what he only wants just sex.. I would love that honey moon thing. 💏

Please respect my opinion. Thank you ladies.✋🙏