Need some advice. Someone to help me make sense of what I’m feeling, in a nonjudgmental way.

I’m a receptionist, I am a sitting duck where everyone and their cousin from the office come up and talk to me. I know everyone, everyone knows me. It’s super common and regular for guys my age, socially considered “attractive“, to come up to me. I’ve never felt weird about any of it, it’s always always felt platonic between any of my coworkers. I’m just a social person, and the people at my work are social. Never any weird feelings.

Well, until this new coworker that started last week. He’s been coming up to talk with me at his lunch. It’s different than other coworkers coming up and talking to me because he’s making a point to come up and talk to me at his break. I can tell he likes me. I’ve been in the game long enough to know when somebody likes me.

He’s only come up four or five days now, but it’s obvious.

Even if I know somebody likes me, I still talk to them the same way. I don’t treat anyone differently. It’s part of my job to be friendly and social. But for the first time, this guy kind of makes me… nervous. Like, you know what I mean... he is a social type that would probably be considered “attractive“ by the majority of the population.… I hate to admit this, but he is my type.

You’re probably wondering, why is this a problem? That sounds awesome. No… It’s not awesome. I am in a five-year relationship with my boyfriend, and I can’t have a guy like this coming around at his lunches talking to me at my desk.

Here’s the real issue… My boyfriend and I have not been in the best place. I mean, ffs we’ve been dating for 5 years and there’s still no ring. We’ve had many conversations, often ending in tears, trying to figure out why he still hasn’t proposed to me. I even tried to break up with him in March, but neither of us really wanted that. He doesn’t know why he hasn’t proposed to me yet, he just still knows that he’s not sure… After five years…

And the timing with this new coworker coming up and talking to me, it’s just really confusing for my head and for my heart. I am conflicted and really don’t know how to feel right now. Part of me wonders if I should break it off with my boyfriend, because as they say once you start getting interested in other boys, it probably means you’re not invested in your relationship anymore… Or maybe this is just a fluke, and my boyfriend and I will get married and live happily ever after. And I need to just try my hardest to ignore this guy…

Can you help me dissect how I’m feeling? Can you tell me a way to get this guy to stop coming around my desk? But still be professional about it?

P.S. You don’t need to worry about the potential of me cheating— I will never ever ever do that. I won’t go seek out convo with him, I won’t go to lunch with him, I won’t get involved with him— not while I’m still in a relationship. I am not worried about the potential of cheating, I’m posting because I’m worried where my heart is and need help understanding these weird emotions and thoughts.