I have a problem

So I dont know from where to start. Im 22 years old. Nine months before i lost my mom. I dont have any kind of a relationship with my father and i dont want to bc he is a bad man. I already had a relationship one year and a half with a guy so his father found me a job and i started living with the me boyfriend and his family he was an adopted child so he was really close an devoted with his family and to me but i was starting to feel choked in this situation. One day i went to my best friend's house for a sleepover i know like 3-4 years and she has a brother close to my age. So that night something started with him and me and after one month we were together and we also ended up being pregnant but i misscaried at 12 weeks. We were living all together me, he, my best friend and their mother. The first two months were good but then fights started to happen between me and him and and things got complicated. After the misscariege we found a place to stay on our own but i started to feel like im judged all the time like everything that happens its my fault. Like im trying to prove im the best girlfriend the best friend and the best housecleaner. I remember when i got pregnant he was calling me his wife after the mc i was his girlfriend. My best friend was saying that we are going to be a family and that he is my husband and I have to be by his side and after the mc i was just his girlfriend. Tonight that she came for a sleepover to our house after my boyfriend went to sleep we started a conversation an she started to tell me that i cant hold my self on things like alcohol cause i like to be high, about my new job that i dont really like and she told me that no job is easy and i have to try cause im on my own and i dont have anyone to support me but before she was saying the opposite and her brother and also my boyfriend doesnt have job he works from time to time fixing cars and she never worked in her life she was always at the house doing the housework and behind her brother's ass. I dont like to be lectured on things i never jugded her for not having personal life and not doing anything to get it or why she is not going to search for a job. I really thought that i found a family and i always thought i had a best friend that loves me and understandes me but everything is falling apart to my eyes and i feel like chose people who judge me based on their own standards. Ivwould really love to have a baby and make a family with him but i feel like his sister has more saying to to everything and nobody can tell her otherwise i really need to be alone and just stop trying to be perfect and have everything cleaned, say always the right thing and have to accept everyones personality and end up to feel unacceptable.