Have to get this off my chest

I’m way more attracted to females and have thought since childhood that my soulmate is another femme but I date men because they pursue me and I can’t find the type of woman I’m looking for. I know a couple of lesbians who are monogamous and married with families, which is what I dream of- but mostly in my area it’s bisexual poly party girls and I’m not attracted to that. Just venting. :(