I have two sweet babies.

2yrs & 3 a month old (unplanned)

But, I’m missing one. My three month old was a twin. He/she didn’t make it far into the pregnancy. The only mark they left was leaving scars on my heart.

No one will let me feel sad about it. They all say “thank goodness! Your hands are already so full.” “Could you imagine?! You’re so lucky it didn’t really happen!”

Even my husband says he is so glad. 😞

Everyone wants me to be happy they didn’t make it. But, I can’t help feeling like there should be another set of toes to coo over. Another diaper to change. How do I mourn when I’m supposed to be so thankful?!