Since it is pride month i want to be proud of me. It’s not a secret that i am not straight. My mom, sister, friends etc all know and i don’t really care it’s not a big deal but i want to come out to my dad.

Why does he not know you might ask well

My dad is a massive homophobe and his church is his life.

Now i didn’t think this would affect em so much but then i started thinking because i live his side of the family i love my great aunts and cousins and i want to talk to them but i know if i come out to my dad everyone will know within an hour and I’ll be probably thought badly of and while i am 18 and an adult and my dad can’t do anything to me my little sister could be affected she is the rebellious child and has most of the attention on her at the best of times but while i am an adult and can escape she isn’t and she could very well have more negative attention focused on her if i came out and was well disowned.

I don’t want to tell my dad to his face that i am not straight because

1) he’ll start crying i can’t handle people crying in front of me

2) he’ll tell em I’m going to hell for like 4th time hesitant year

3) he’ll blame my mom(who is currently divorcing him) and i don’t want her to be attacked for something she didn’t do and possible lose custody of my little sister

But i desperately want to come out i want to not have to lie to him because i hate lying to anyone about anything

Anyone have advice i know it’s a lot but I’m scared and it’s all i think about lately