Affair

I just can't take it anymore. Been with my partner 3 years. Engaged last year was (trust me was) ttc. This is how it goes.

I was his secret mistress,side ho, secret bitch. But I didn't know he was marrying another woman and had two kids with her. But any how she found out after I told her but I gave in to him. A year later we are living together at this point and I find pictures of some womans boobs and vagina on his phone. He said it was a webcam girl contacting him on Facebook. I let it slide to avoid confrontation. I ask a few days later again after finding he owes £8000 in tax he didn't pay when self employed. He went to punch me twice and pinned me up against the oven. He said again it was some webcam girl and because I was scared I let it slide. A while later forward to this February I get a message from the girl I suspected it was saying they had been having an affair. It's now June and it was my birthday Tuesday he went all out with gifts but it just didn't seem enough to me. He asked me for a baby and only got engaged to me last October after their affair had ended and I said was it because of that and he said no it was because I chose you. At first I said oh so it was a contest 😂. But hey ho.

Theirs a breife description leaving out the ex partner with the drama with his kids etc as that's a whole lot of other drama to set me off. But we just argued and you know what it felt so good to tell him to not bother with my birthday again as it felt like he had to as didn't bother last year he says he's hurt. I feel guilty but kind of don't. I hope it's hurt him. And I really want him to leave. I don't love home anymore