To summarize everything; if you had a married Christian female friend stay at home mom of 2 who is driving her husband to the point of talking about suicide when he’s not around her-would you tell her or not?

If you’d like more details, keep reading.

Let’s call her C and him D. C and D met in college and partied and studied hard. They would fight regularly about stupid things. C is very much about her image and ideas of how things should be and D is more laid back, fun loving, hard working and family guy. C’s parents are divorced because of mom’s control issues and D’s parents are still married but mom wears the pants for the most part. Both have controlling moms in their lives. C and D got married and spent a TON of money on the wedding and rings-significantly more than they could or should have spent. After marriage C decided she wanted a baby. They got pregnant and she decided on her own to be a SAHM at 9 weeks pregnant, leaving her husband to pay the huge amounts of wedding debt. D has a great job that pays well (low 100k a year) and they bought a beautiful house in a nice suburb which obviously comes with a large mortgage payment. C booked a trip to Bali while she was pregnant and put it on the credit cards to “surprise” D with it. More debt for him to pay off. Baby comes and suddenly both don’t spend any time outside of home and work for him. Understandable-I’m a mom and know what it’s like to have a newborn. 7 months go by and C is finally ready to reconnect with everyone. She reconnected by going on lunch dates with everyone and insisting on paying for everyone-more debt for D to pay. Baby turns 1 and they decide to have another. Happened instantly. Their first was a girl and this time it was a boy. D is a 3rd generation with the same name and wanted to carry on the family name but C guilted him and made him feel terrible for wanting to carry on his name so he agreed to the name she wanted. Immediately after this incident there was a bachelor party and it was D’s first time hanging out with the guys since before the first was born. It was to be an overnight camping trip with beer and hanging out. He got to the bachelor party and within 4 hours C was texting him telling him how he’s a terrible person for leaving her alone with a toddler while she’s pregnant and that he needs to get home that night. He had been drinking and he told her that. She said I guess you care more about yourself than me and your daughter. That cut him deep (I’m sure it wasn’t the first time something like that happened, it was just the first public display). He grabbed a bottle of vodka and started chugging it while crying saying “screw it. She wants me to come home and I told her I’ve been drinking but she doesn’t care. I’m going to get as drunk as I can and try to get home so that God willing I die”. That’s when one friend got up and wrestled the keys from him and told him he’s not going anywhere. It’s been 1.5 years and they still don’t talk because of that moment. D ended up falling asleep when everyone else did but then woke up to C calling him over and over and over again and so he got his keys and drove home. He didn’t wreck. We didn’t hear from either of them for about 2 weeks. Fast forward to after the birth of his son. His son never wanted to be held by him for some unknown reason. C made it a point to tell him daily that the boy doesn’t like his dad because dad is always working and thinking only of himself. From my view point I only see D working and slaving over his wife’s needs. He comes home and does the dishes, folds the laundry, makes dinner, bathes the kids, puts them to bed half the time and does whatever else she has on her honey do list-things like paint the house, flatten the yard, build a fence etc etc. he’s gained a lot of weight and when we were over for dinner last month and C was upstairs he looked at us and said “I think I’m dying. I want to be happy again. I think if I could just work out once or twice a week I’d feel better”. Yesterday, C told me that she got a gym membership so that she can get more in shape (she’s in AMAZING shape and hairs always perfect and make up done). I asked her when she’s going to be going and she told me “as soon as D gets home from work I’m going to go and he can watch the kids”. I was floored. I wanted to cry for D. My stepmom committed sucked when I was in High school so I’m very aware of how devastating a suicide can be. I was friends with C first and I do love her, but she is terrible. I mean TERRIBLE to her amazing husband. Watching the way she treats him makes me just want to go and hug my husband and thank him over and over again for everything. They go to hutch, but I don’t think she has a real active faith in her life. I’ve never seen a bible in their house, I’ve seen her bow her head once to pray and that was at church, and she has a tattoo of a symbol of Christianity. I don’t know what to do or say. I don’t want him to feel alone, lost, depressed or stuck so bad that he thinks death is the only way. I love our friends and their kids. I want to see them work it out, but she has a way of taking everything the worst way and blowing it up way out of proportion. I mentioned how her toddler startled my baby once and she went on a rampage telling me how her daughter is harmless and did nothing wrong and that maybe I shouldn’t worry about it. What’s interesting is that we were talking about how much my LO likes her toddler and how even when she startled him he still wanted to play immediately after. She just couldn’t see how it wasn’t a negative thing. This is such a long post. Thank you for reading.