Fear of losing Virginity

Hey lovelies!

Last night I tried having sex (penetration) again with my partner. I keep freaking out right before he reaches my hymen, it’s as if the thought of losing my virginity makes me go crazy. I start panicking and having to collect myself. He has always been understanding and instead holds me and makes sure I feel better.

I deal with past trauma being molested at 5 years old, and I also deal with the enculturation of strict religious views on virginity.

I’ve made a similar post to this before, but would like more advice/tips. Has anyone felt the same way? Will I be able to overcome this? I feel trapped.

I am grateful to have a partner that is understanding, I hope I am able to grow from this.

Thank you.