Realizing you’re sometimes the problem.

I’m always seeing post on here with women complaining about their relationships and always blaming the husband/spouse. I think admitting that you’re the problem is a huge pill to swallow for women now days. So I just want to share my experience. My husband and I are going through a lot right now.. and we’ve had some problems. All of them are stress related to everything going on, that we can’t control. We’re not perfect, he hasn’t been the best husband, but I really haven’t been the best wife. We disagree and bicker at each other, and we fight, occasionally. I’ve always been the person to be very defensive and I’ll admit, it’s hard for me to admit when I’m wrong. I have always subconsciously looked for every reason for the other person to be wrong. I’ve always been that way, but I’m working on it. But I’ve had a realization the past couple of weeks after my husband and I almost separated. I have been really depressed for the past several months and my entire perspective on life completely changed without me even realizing it. I didn’t see the happiness in little things anymore, not even the big things. Every part of my personality started to change, I wasn’t laughing anymore, I wasn’t expressing any love for him anymore. I didn’t realize me isolating myself, would affect anyone else. My attitude about everything really started to tear us apart. Men need love and reassurance too. They see when things start drifting apart, they see when you’re no longer happy, no matter if it’s because of them or not, they’ll think it is. Women have this false perception of men in their heads. That they don’t want affection, that they don’t care if you’re lovey dovey or distant. They do, it bother them in the same way it bothers us. I’m so glad I realized what I was doing wrong, and decided to fix it to fix our relationship. I love that man more than any man I’ve ever met. He’s a sweetheart to me, a father to my son, and wonderful person. And I almost let myself throw that away. Y’all need to look at yourself and stop throwing stones in glass houses. That’s no way to live your life. So many people have let so many good things go, because they won’t admit they’re wrong. Marriage and relationships shouldn’t be one against another. They should be each other against the everyone else.